Are you like me and when the microwave breaks, the dilemma threatens to spawn an entire kitchen remodel??

You know what happens if you give a mouse a cookie, right?

If you’ve been around children any time in the last four decades or so, you may have encountered the book, If You Give a Mouse a Cookie, by Laura Numeroff. It’s a fun little story about how one thing leads to another.

The little boy in the story invites a mouse (at least hypothetically) into his home for a cookie. And before it’s all over, the kid has ransacked his home to help the mouse groom himself, to facilitate the mouse sweeping and scrubbing all the floors, to build the mouse a tiny bed, and finally to give him more milk and cookie after he’s depleted all nourishment from the fateful snack that set the whole fiasco into motion.

Lately my appliances, and thoughts of home repair in general, have made me feel a little like the poor kid in the book trying to keep the mouse satisfied.

My broken microwave is like that mouse, sort of…

As you may have noticed, I’ve been working my way through the house making some improvements (Even though I’ve been absent for a while, which I’ll explain in an upcoming blog post…) However, I haven’t had the budget or the guts to tackle the kitchen yet. But the microwave dilemma has forced me to consider it, and put me right in the middle of a “give a mouse a cookie” scenario.”

Here’s what happened:

My microwave finally kicked the bucket the week before last.

You see, my microwave matches my stove, which also matches my refrigerator. 

Truth is, they all still work, at least in respect to their primary functions. But they all also have peripheral issues which are putting a strain on our relationship.

The microwave

I’ve lovingly replaced and repaired door parts on my microwave in the past, trying to preserve the still fully functioning actual microwave. But with relentless daily use, other flimsy plastic DOOR parts are now broken—to the point that the door will not latch. And therefore the microwave will not turn on. I don’t know if the manufacturers envisioned someone opening and closing the door on that appliance as much as we have over the years (homeschoolers eat round the clock)…

The stove

My stove, also still functioning, is gradually losing its paint around the knobs on one side from where steam has repeatedly released from inside the oven while cooking. Also the door handle has to be re-tightened every few days, as it wants to come completely disconnected from the door. Which has happened on more than one occasion. (No one’s been injured so far…)

I also have greasy drips and stains INSIDE the oven’s glass door, which I’ve dismantled and cleaned once (see an example of the tedious process here…). But I have no desire to do it again. (The handle was coming loose prior to me dismantling the door, mind you.)

The refrigerator

The refrigerator’s ice-maker has repeatedly malfunctioned for many years, due to poor design…and perhaps demonic possession. The metal arm which controls overflow gets stuck and stops ice production just ahead of whenever we have company over, so that just when we need it most, we run completely out of ice. How does it even know (it didn’t happen once during lockdown…)??

Additionally, I’ve had to replace the water dispensing lever in the door, and it has broken for the second time. The inside and outside of the fridge has suffered a fair amount of wear and tear as well.

When is it appropriate to replace working (but limping along) appliances?

All of the appliances are around fifteen years old, I’d guess. The matching dishwasher had to be replaced a couple of years ago, after me ordering parts and making repairs until the only option was replacement. 

But my thinking is that I hate to replace the microwave without simultaneously replacing the stove, since it hangs directly over the stove and is obviously part of a matched set. 

Furthermore, it seems only logical and tidy to replace ALL of the appliances at once.

But won’t new appliances make my countertops look worse?

But if I replace the appliances, it’d be a shame not to go ahead and replace the countertops as they’ve seen their better days, and have many scratches, a few burn marks, and some missing trim.

And the stove is in an awkward corner unto itself with a small, rolling, counter-height metal and wood table/cart beside it which affords us a tiny work surface adjacent to the stove. 

And isn’t it time to update a few problem areas in the 100 year old kitchen?

If I’m going to replace the countertops, I’d like to add a narrow section of countertop and cabinetry against the side of the stove where the current makeshift table/cart stands. 

Additionally, if I’m replacing all the countertops, I’d like to go ahead and raise up the heights of my counters which for these thirteen years have hit me at thigh level (I guess people were shorter 100 years ago…?), most of the time resulting in back soreness every time I deal with a sink full of dishes. 

Now we’re talking cabinetry… and big bucks…

In order to raise the counters, however, I will have to modify or replace my cabinets. And if I raise up my lower cabinets, I’ll have to also raise the upper ones, which flank the windows over my sink. At that time, the trim around the windows will most likely have to be repaired. 

Don’t forget the floors…

And if all of these improvements are made, I’d like to go ahead and upgrade my flooring from stick-on tile to actual linoleum tile. Of course, I’ll probably have to have a specialist come in and check for asbestos… And possibly replace the old subfloor…

And perhaps a floorpan modification?

While I’m at it, should I rethink the layout of my entire kitchen to solve traffic flow problems and the awkward placement of the fridge (whose doors won’t open all the way…) in one corner, and the stove in the other?

Will I have to eliminate part of the hallway which leads to the bedrooms? If that happens, the operation of the microwave will probably be too loud as it would be even closer to the bedrooms, and therefore, I’ll probably have to come up with a new, quieter solution to replace the replacement microwave…

Where does it all end??

If this all sounds a little over the top, you’re right—it is.

Reality check:

I’ve recently spent a lot of time at my parents’ house and have been reminded of the fact that they’ve had exactly two stoves during their fifty-five years of marriage. And they only bought one of those new. The current model is one they bought second-hand from a family member many years ago. It only has one oven rack and two eyes that are still in working order. Could they afford to replace it? Absolutely. Has it ever risen to the top of the priority list? Nope.

And yet, my mom still manages to cook jam cakes for church fundraisers every fall, among many other delicious dishes cooked throughout the year. They have a countertop microwave which doesn’t match the stove, which doesn’t match the refrigerator, and none of which match the dishwasher that hasn’t been used more than five or ten times in fifty years. My parents prefer to hand wash. Go figure…

The whole microwave predicament also made me think of a new missionary acquaintance who has just returned from many years on the mission field to the present economic situation in our area (and much of the country) of sky-high used cars, and equally expensive housing. She and her family have moved into a modest rental and are piecing together kitchen ware from Goodwill and probably other thrift stores, in addition to donations from church members. With no complaining. Matching appliances was not on her list of “needs.”

I DO realize I’m no more in real need of matching appliances than my parents or my new missionary friend. And furthermore, should it really be taking up this much mental bandwidth at this juncture? When I’m not actually ready to throw my energy and resources into redoing the kitchen?

My conclusion

So what I have here is a “first-world problem.” A humorous “dilemma” at best.

Stay tuned to see what solution we come up with. Do I remodel the whole house because our microwave croaked? Or will I end up plunking down a $50 model on our kitchen counter until I can regroup and make the most prudent plan of action?

In the meantime, my now adult daughters have learned what life was like before microwaves. They’ve learned that leftovers can actually be reheated on the stovetop and/or in the oven. And no one has yet gone hungry. 

Will my kitchen be nominated to grace the cover of Better Homes this year? Probably not. Will we survive this latest crisis? Almost definitely.

Perhaps we (ahem… I…) just need to slow down and get a little perspective.

In the grand scheme of things, the microwave debacle of 2021 probably won’t even be long remembered. In the midst of a lingering pandemic, family illness, Geek Squad having to salvage files off my crashed computer, car troubles, having to bring in a critter-ridder to deal with wire-chewing squirrels in my attic, and one of my cats suddenly deciding to use my sofa as his new litter box,(all maybe topics for blog posts another day) perhaps I let it get a little out of proportion…

Wise words

As my younger daughter is fond of saying, “It’s just not that deep.”

And for that, I’m thankful.

How about you? Have you had any household crises lately that have disproportionately overwhelmed you? Any dilemmas that don’t seem to have a simple solution? Any proverbial “straws” breaking the proverbial camel’s back?

Feel free to unburden yourself and share in the comments below!